For a life time – friends only

Everyone here? Ok. Let`s go through the rest of this post.
There was another event today. This morning, my grandpa came to a room where my grandma was sitting watching TV. She is not doing well lately, she is 83, started to forget things, names, faces of people around, days, months…. Last year she broke her hip. After operation she was improving but then her bones started to hurt this spring and now she spends a lot of time in bed. Somehow I feel she gave up on everything :awww:
Well, my grandpa sat by her side, put his arm around her shoulder and asked her: "Do you know why is this day special? Today we are celebrating 60 years of marriage." Then he did something I have never seen in my life before. He kissed her lips three times and I can tell you this was complete awww-moment. She was just looking at him smiling. Thinking of that make my eyes full of tears. That much of a rude swordsman, huh? ๐Ÿ˜›
He bought her a flowers and my aunt brought a fruit cake.

Ten years ago, I asked him what was it like, how did they decide to got married.
"I was seeing her around", he said. "Then one day I decided to come to her on a street and ask her for a date. So, next weekend we went for a walk by the Danube. Another weekend we had date again, I took her to a circus and then walked her home. Third weekend I asked her to marry me…"
I was amazed. Their life was never easy. My grandmother already had a kid, my father, and he was a result of her crush with some bastard who let her down the moment he realised she was pregnant. Today it is not a big deal but in 1940s it was disgrace for both a family and a girl. But my grandpa never gave a second thought to that, he made a decision of his life and stick to that. They both did. And never regret it.
This is what I want for me. To look someone in the eyes 60 years from now and say that I still love her. Knowing it was the best choice in my life….
As I said, my grandma is not doing well lately; a photo I posted down there is made three years ago.

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262 Responses to For a life time – friends only

  1. thaodp says:

    Ow, that's so sweet, Darko. Thank you for sharing such happy moments. Your post make me shed tears.Congratulate to your grandparents :hat:

  2. Spaggyj says:

    I hope that Mik and I will still be as in love as your grandparents when we're old :happy: . What a heartwarming story. I hope you'll find that special woman for you, Darko :yes:

  3. gdare says:

    San, take your time :happy:Kimmie, thanks. I guess you and Mik are doing quite all right by now :)Mira, thank you, I hope they will; they looked so happy today :)Mit, thank you; I am sorry if my post make you cry but life is made of tears too, sometimes ๐Ÿ˜€

  4. thaodp says:

    Sorry? Why? Because you made me feel happy? Oh man, I can say you don't know how your post touchs my heart ๐Ÿ™‚

  5. MirabelaTM says:

    Darko, I hope they will celebrate many more years together :happy: I believe in love that lasts a lifetime. I'm sure you'll meet your lady.

  6. sanshan says:

    I don't know what to say, I feel very emotional about this. My parents have been married 54 years. Sigh. I'll write some more later. Thanks for sharing. :heart:

  7. ricewood says:

    This is one emotional post if I ever saw one. Swordsman or not – I think this makes you even more masculine in your appearance.I have been married for a little over 20 years, and I tell my wife daily that I love her. I would like to hope for an additional 40 years, but I know I can't hope for that. Nevertheless I am happy and grateful to have been married to someone who never mistrusted me, or was never ever jealous.I hope that you'll find your partner sooner or later. Love is a dedication more than it's a feeling. I mean, the feeling comes from the dedication, not the other way around.My experience…

  8. thaodp says:

    Well, this helps me have a perfect Saturday. Bye for now.

  9. gdare says:


  10. gdare says:


  11. Furie says:

    Slip of the finger? :left:

  12. gdare says:

    Bye and have fun ๐Ÿ˜€

  13. Furie says:

    Awww, that's so sweet. ๐Ÿ˜€ Don't worry Darko, you'll find the right guy. :devil:

  14. L2D2 says:

    That story is just achingly sweet, Dare, and I am sitting here crying, also. That is the kind of marriage my parents had, and that is the kind of marriage that I hope and pray for you also. Even though I kid you about it all the time, I want you to have real happiness like that.Your grandparents look such a nice couple and you are lucky to have them in your life.Thanks for baring your heart to your friends, Dare. I say it again—you are a very special man.

  15. PainterWoman says:

    A very touching post Darko. Makes me think of my sweet neighbors across the street. They are both 94 and have been married since they were 18…..76 yrs! Hard to imagine. Your grandfather telling your grandmother everyday that he loved her makes a world of difference. Having a man say that to you no matter what you look like when you are cooking, scrubbing, digging in the garden or cleaning up the kids is wonderful. I believe there has to be a type of bonding emotionally, spiritually and physically between two people for a marriage to last. I always wanted that but never had it. Your grandparents have it.

  16. gdare says:

    Allan, I know. It is the strange way things turn sometimes and all we can do is to flow with it, giving our best.Originally posted by ricewood:

    feeling comes from the dedication

    It was nice said.Linda, I was so moved when I saw them today. They looked happy, even for a while, and life has lost that boring touch of the routine. It was like a fresh breeze on a warm day :happy:Thank you ๐Ÿ™‚

  17. L2D2 says:

    I completely agree, Pam. My mom and dad had it and some of my brothers and sisters have it.And some of us never had it. Life is strange. It is way too late for me, but I am mostly OK with that now. My fault, really, because I have been too scared to trust again.

  18. sanshan says:

    I agree with Allan about dedication. These days it is so easy to give up when times get tough. What I find so remarkable about your grandparents is that they got married after knowing eachother only 3 weeks!My best friend, she met a man in a bar one night, and they went home together that very night. Three days later they moved in together. And now, they have been married over 20 years. She says he drives her crazy a lot of the time, but she couldn't imagine her life without him. This has taught me that it is so important to be open to the moment, and trust your instincts. If I meet someone now….47 + 60 = :eyes:

  19. Dacotah says:

    :awww: Darko, that is so sweet to hear about your grandfather kissing her three times on their anniversary.:hat: Happy 60th Anniversary to them :hat:Darko, I hope your grandma feels better soon. You will know when you find the right woman. ๐Ÿ™‚

  20. ellinidata says:

    Darn it Darko! ๐Ÿ˜ฅ *tears of good emotions*,I almost missed this one!!!! Gosh ! this is a sweet beyond sweetness post! This grandpa of yours is one lucky man! Actually both of your grandparents are two lucky people!:heart: I wish them many more anniversaries :yes:when my late mom was alive, she will seat at the couch in the living room till my dad was ready to go to bed. Many times I asked why she is half sleeping and not going to bed and she used to say "I enjoy his company even if he is watching the news in TV" well Darko, I hope one day you find that special one,the one that will see you for who you realy are,so far all of us who see your way of thinking ,and your compassion we know "she will be one lucky lady!" :)thanks SO very much for sharing this special even with us!

  21. gdare says:

    Pam, there was a special kind of relation they had and I remember once, I was still a kid when she was talking to some friends about their marriage, with all its ups and downs; she said: "Love? No there is no love anymore but there is mutual respect…" I guess their love grew up to something else but it was still love, at its core.Linda, having bad experiences can change people and their attitude. If there was no grandpa around maybe she would stay a single mom for a whole life…San, at first I thought he was making fun out of me. I mean, 3 weeks??? I can`t trust no one after only three weeks, but I guess things were a bit different in their case. And he was only 20 in 1949. She was 23 :faint: Comparing to them I was a kid when I was 20…Carol, thank you :)Angeliki, the best days of their life were when they got both retired and bought a small vineyard 50km from Zemun; they have made a small barrack and spend there 6 months out of a year; when I was visiting them I was amazed with all the little "systems" they developed together to make their time the best possible :happy:

  22. ricewood says:

    Children don't seem to bond people much – problems sometimes do. But the most important thing in bonding, I think, is the ability to say: "Sit down and relax, dear. I'll do the cooking tonight." Instead of saying: "It's your turn to do the cooking tonight."

  23. gdare says:

    Allan, there is an old story about a man who missed to save a man out from a water because he sd "Give me your hand" instead of "Here, grab my hand". It is all in personality and a way of solving things out :up:

  24. sanshan says:

    Yes, I remember times like that as well. I asked my sister last week if she ever heard our parents arguing. We couldn't think of a time though my dad would raise his voice to us! He sometimes complained to me that mom would drive him crazy (she's just like me!) but I know he respects her deeply. That's the thing, they may not have agreed with one another but they always respected eachother.

  25. L2D2 says:

    Let me let you in on a little secret—-young people today are hard to get out of the house. They do not want to leave because, they either pay no rent to their parents, or a nominal amount, Mama does their laundry for them, cooks their meals and lets them use the car, gives them gas money when they need funds, the list goes on. They do not want the responsibilities that come with living on their own and supporting themselves.I saw a documentary about that subject one time. All these guys in their 20s and 30s were living at home so they could spend their money on themselves!My son lived with me, with the exception of about a year, until he was 34, at which time, he got married and moved into a house they bought.

  26. sanshan says:

    Yes, people were older more mature back then. But then there is my sister who got married at age 19! I was just looking to have fun at that age. :right:

  27. sanshan says:

    I agree. Yet , my brother has grown up since moving out, and is the most responsible of all of us kids. He has paid off his house in only 5 years and is the best dad.

  28. gdare says:

    San, when things were rough between them you and your sister were the ones that must be quiet, right? ๐Ÿ˜†

  29. gdare says:

    Oh my, comments are multiplying :lol:But why did he stayed at parent`s house? I would rather move out and have a life of my own. This is the best for a sound relationship, between them and between them and their parents, too.

  30. gdare says:

    If he was the youngest then it explains everything ๐Ÿ˜›

  31. gdare says:

    San, I couldn`t even imagine myself married with 19 :faint: One of my friends got married when he was 20, his girlfriend got pregnant and they decided to keep the child and stay together. Now they are about 20 years married and have two kids, older one already 19 :faint: And they had really hard life, at one point they both lost jobs and had 2 little kids around.I guess problems could bond people more than we imagine :left:

  32. L2D2 says:

    Dare, my dad was 18 and Mama was 17 when they got married. They were from farming families and there was no car (only rich people had cars) and they would go to church in a horse-drawn wagon for their dates.They were married for 40 years, but he died at age 56, so that was all the time they had together. I was born when Daddy was your age, the youngest of 8. My mom said they never had a fight—they would get ticked off at each other sometimes, but it never, ever escalated into a real argument. I never heard a really mean word between them. I thought I would have the same thing when I married, but discovered they were the exception and not the rule.

  33. sanshan says:

    My little brother met a girl when he was 19 and she was 18, just finishing school. They went out for a number of years, and my brother lived at home with my parents until he was 28…and he was still going out with this girl. She said she'd never live with him until he moved out and lived on his own. Guess what? He never did. He moved in with her, they had 2 kids…and weren't married until 5 years ago. I guess they've been together now for 25 years. 25 + 19…yeah that's about right. Yeah, I couldn't imagine doing that at 19.

  34. sanshan says:

    He stayed at my parent's house because they allowed him to. It's funny, because as a child he was such a brat. And yet he stayed there until he moved in with his girlfriend. Me, I couldn't wait to leave! (My sister obviously as well)

  35. gdare says:

    I remember them arguing when I was a kid, but after the "fire" was out everything got back to normal. I think it was their way of dealing with problems and there were so many of them. But since retirement they argued rarely, I can`t remember one or two times in more than 20 years.

  36. L2D2 says:

    My son became a respectable citizen also. He never would keep a job, but he has done nothing BUT work since he got married. She is a semi-invalid and can't work, so he has to work all his waking hours just about. I am proud of him for the way he has turned his life around, but worry about him because he is under too much pressure.

  37. sanshan says:

    In response to a much earlier question…me? quiet?

  38. gdare says:

    Thanks MizzM ๐Ÿ˜€

  39. gdare says:

    This is why young people back in 1940s were so mature – always on the edge of existance, they had a little or nothing at all and lot of decisions needed to be thought out carefully, at least for the sake of children. Then they got overprotective and this is what we have today – spoiled kids :PI was always kind of independent (and stubborn too ๐Ÿ˜† ) and was happy to leave my parents` place when I was 22; I left to live with my grandparents because most of the year they were not around, spending their time in a village :happy: Now they are too old to go anywhere and they need someone to take care of some of their needs. But sincerely, I don`t know what I could do without help of my aunt and my mom, they are around when I am working.

  40. gdare says:

    ๐Ÿ˜† Well, I guess not ๐Ÿ˜› You were a rebel, right? My father was too hard on me so I had to keep quiet most of my childhood. Unlike my brother. Then my stubborness erupted and I decided it was enough :happy:

  41. MizzMartinez says:

    ๐Ÿ˜ฅ I got tears in my eyes! Your post is very touchful (? – is there even a word?). I hope that you can do it…

    To look someone in the eyes 60 years from now and say that I still love her. Knowing it was the best choice in my life….

  42. Dacotah says:

    You are welcome Darko. ๐Ÿ™‚

  43. SittingFox says:

    Congratulations to your grandparents – that is an amazing milestone! :hat:

  44. gdare says:

    Carol :happy:Adele, thank you :happy:

  45. Dacotah says:

    Darko :happy:

  46. ellinidata says:

    somehow I feel this posts should nominated as the "Best Opera post Ever " :heart: maybe one day you will consider of making it "public acess" and I mean it fom the :heart:

  47. ellinidata says:

    I sure do Darko,maybe one day you will change your mind, this can be an inspiration to many membersunfortunately the longer I stay on Opera the more troubled hearts I see here, people that need to read posts like this and to find hope for a better tomorrow…. :heart:please give a big hug to grandma for me, I know getting old is something we will face one day and even if she forgets many things,I know she remembers the hugs… :love:

  48. gdare says:

    Thank you :heart:

  49. gdare says:

    Angeliki, I was thinking about that right after I made it. Then, I saw too many personal stuff there and decided it should be for my friends only. I am happy all of you like it, though :happy:

  50. L2D2 says:

    I loved this post and I love a man who can bare his soul in this way.

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