I have found this funny website about dog`s and cat`s diaries. Have fun :jester:
The Dog's Diary
8:00 am – Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am – A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am – A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am – Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm – Milk bones! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm – Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm – Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm – Dinner! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm – Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm – Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm – Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
The Cat's Diary
Day 983 of My Captivity
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now …
gdare 
I love it. I loved the lolcat top 100 video email too. Cats are such great subjects for things like this. Thanks for sharing it Dare. Oddly enough, I have never received this one. I might just copy and paste it into an email and send to all my animal loving friends!
Check out Zaph's latest post, Joe!
😎 Nice, Joe! 😀
😆 Excellent!
I have read this before, it's still funny 😆 love the picture too 😀
Kimmie, I have got it before by e-mail but still thought it would be funny to post here. It just shows the difference, right? :DBud :cheers:What`s that all about a "Joe"???
There's a reason my people have been at war with the cats for centuries. They're pure evil…
bookemarked!;lol:very funny! thanks for sharing! :up: :yes: ;love:
Yeah Dark it's spot-on, I think 😆
Carol, you are welcome :DStar 😛 :DDirk :devil: One day, that little yellow spy….. :devil:
Linda, this is probably because I got it by mail only in Serbian; this is first time I have found original text (Serbian one was probably a translation) :)Adele :DMik, eternal war between light and darkness, right? :knight:Angeliki, you are welcome :DKimmie :DStar, that would be dogs, right? 😛 😆
Hi Darko, thank you for the laughs. 😀
One shall stand, one shall fall. :knight:
:p Darko.:lol:
Carol 😉 😀
You can really tell which one is the evil one, can't you?:lol:
😆
😀 😀 😀
… really a nice one :yes:
Mik, this is Shakespeare? 😀
🙂
Originally posted by Furie:
That will always be the cats. It's a rule.
Excellent post :yes::lol:I thought we need such this :lol::lol:
I love cats. 😆
It's all explained very well here .
Linda, I knew this may start a war here 😆 :lol:San, I always thought cats are sent here from another Galaxy to rule us; if this is a video call for help, then more cats are going to come, right? :insane: :PNatalya, a good laugh is a good laugh – and always welcome :DKiran, I had no doubt about that 😆
😆 😆 Thanks for the link, this is great :yes:
😆 😆 😆 this was hilarious!
Jill :DKiran, the way you laughed up there 😀
:sherlock: Really? Why so?
I really love cats, man. A dog bit my mom recently. She had to take injections for a month.
Darko, it is a classic but it's not Shakespeare. I'll be putting up the latest source today. 😉
Kiran :yes:Mik, ok, I`ll check on it 😀
I was bit by a cat once. Got blood poisoning. Had my arm in a sling for 2 weeks. 😦 I wuv pusshykats! 😥 :cat:
But it seems that cat didn`t particularly liked you :awww:
LMAO. And very true as well. I once read something to the effect that "Barney the dog just had his 2,335th Best Day in a row." 😆
No wonder there are so many divorces. :whistle:
😆
Dogs always seem to be happy with their lives :DI`ve read about simple test that can be performed. Put a dog and a wife in a car trunk. When you open it after a couple of hours, who will be really happy to see you?:P
Attitude! Now that's what I like about cats. And dogs are cute because they are so plain dumb and adorable. They really should be married. You know balance in the universe and that mumbo jumbo? It might just work. Dogs I think make excellent hen pecked husbands! 😮 😮
My dog Sasha isn't dumb. She's like a little Marie Curie. It's kinda scary actually. 🙂
LMAO.Probably calling out for pepperoni pizza. :p
Cheesey, I was suspecting but now I have a proof: you are woman!!! :PEd, yes it is scary. Especially if she is experimenting with radio-activity :insane::D
:yes:
😆 😆 :DMy 4 cat's diary :-0000 – 0600hrs : sleep0601 – 0605hrs : breakfast0606 – 1300hrs : sleep1301 – 1303hrs : lunch1304 – 1800hrs : sleep1801 – 1805hrs : dinner1806 – 2359hrs : sleepand on and on and on and on..:cat: 😎 😀
😆 :lol:They live very active life… between sleeping 😀
😆 Yes `very active` that`s y they hv 9 lives 😆
:lol:.
😀 So cute and so true Darko. Dogs seem happy for any and every thing…..except for going to the vet.
Originally posted by PainterWoman:
That's why I prefer cats who tell you to go take a leap when they get tired of you. Could that be why I am not a married woman? 😆